Flame on, Flame Con! My First Experience at the World’s Largest Queer Comic Con

Credit: Flame Con/Geeks OUT

If you follow Derby Comics on social, you likely know I attended my first Flame Con at the Sheraton Times Square in New York City this past weekend. The 2023 event marked the 9th anniversary of Flame Con, the world’s largest LGBTQ comics and pop culture convention. The event is organized by Geeks OUT, a non-profit that “seeks to rally, promote, and empower the queer geek community.” And not only was this my first Flame Con, I was invited as a member of the press by the event’s organizers, making it my first ever Con with credentials!

Talk about pressure. I woke up at 4 am of the event’s first morning due to nerves. I write opinions about comic books on the internet and I was about to be surrounded by some of the most talented queer creators — people who create goods with their bare hands for everyone, including myself, to enjoy. It was daunting! As someone who grew up as a white, cis, masc-presenting male, these were questions I struggled with knowing that I’d be around others who had entirely different lived experiences and may have dealt with issues I could only read about. Was I really the right person to retell their stories? Was I prepared enough or would I make a dummy of myself? What gave me the special privilege to report on the event and ask people questions? Would anyone take me seriously? Doubts swirled in my end when I realized I was going to have to talk to strangers. I’m not a journalist by trade, I got into writing about comics during the pandemic as a means of dealing with anxiety. Did I make a mistake by introducing a brand new layer of social anxiousness by putting myself in this position? Even though I went in with this elevated anxiety, Flame Con turned out to be the most welcoming and inclusive place I’ve ever been and I’m already anxious to get back next year to be around my fellow queers (and allies)!

Every piece of programming at Flame Con was meticulously curated by the event team to provide the queerest experience possible and elevate queer creators in a multitude of ways. From insightful panels with industry experts to micro mentoring workshops to an insanely diverse artist alley with a mix of authors, illustrators, craftspeople, and more, you would have been hard pressed find something to do that didn’t celebrate queerness in some way. I tried to soak up as much as I could but there just weren’t enough time to experience it all. Three of my favorite panels were:

  • Finding the Queer Fiction You Want to Read moderated by A.K. Faulkner with Greg Lockard, Shiri Sondheimer, and David R. Slayton. This panel covered the various ways readers can discover new queer content based on a litany of different themes. One of the biggest things I took away from this panel is how much the queer creator community supports one another — if you enjoy one queer creator’s work, take a look at the other queer creators they follow/repost on social media. Also, if you aren’t finding the books/titles you want in your local bookstores, the best thing to do is ask them to carry it! Shops need to know there is demand for things before they will take a chance and stock smaller/self-publishers.

  • But Make It Queer: Turning Mainstream Universes Gay moderated by Anthony Oliveira with Charlie Jane Anders, Alyssa Wong, Terry Blas, and Sway. Probably the most insightful panel of the entire weekend, the featured creators spoke about the current state of queer representation in mainstream comics and gave extremely personal insights into how they’ve tried to help bring queerness into some of Marvel and DC’s best-selling titles. But as Charlie Jane put it, “we’re at the start of a process, not the end.” These publishers still have a long way to go and we as fans need to keep pushing them. “We can create all the queer characters we want, but it doesn’t matter if they don’t get used again,” added Terry Blas.

  • X2: The X-Gaymes 2 hosted by Homo Superior Podcast with special guests Charlie Jane Anders and Jay Jurden. I’ve been big fans of this podcast for some time now and had previously chatted with them on Instagram. While it was a highlight to finally meet them in person, they hosted a hilarious X-Men themed gameshow full of jokes, audience participation, and Snazzy Kitty Pryde in rollerskates cosplay. The entire room erupted in laughter multiple times and it felt like one big family party where everyone was an X-Men nerd. Talk about feeling at home!

Left to Right: Charlie Jane Anders, Alyssa Wong, Sway, Terry Blas, and Anthony Oliveira

In addition to these awesome panels, artist alley (you can find the full list here) had some of the most creative minds I’ve ever been around. Every booth was full of something to catch your eye and it was difficult trying to stay within my self-imposed merch budget! I got to discover new queer artists who I’m now following on social and already resisting the urge to give them even more money (at least until my next paycheck). I also got to fanboy and speak to creators who I’ve followed and enjoyed as a consumer of comic book content and they were all SO nice and excited to be there, including Alyssa Wong, Sway, Stephanie Williams, Tate Brombal, and Josh Trujillo. Below are a couple pictures detailing the merch haul I ended up taking home with me, leave a comment if you’re interested in anything and I’ll let you know the creator!

One thing I want to touch on before I finish the article is the attention to accessibility details that was on display at even the smallest level of the event:

  • Flame Con enforced a strict COVID-19 policy that required attendees to be masked at all times while indoors and show proof of vaccination or a negative test in the past 72 hours. These may seem like overly restrictive rules in 2023, but they were well received and followed by all guests given that recent conventions have turned into superspreader events. Some members of the queer community are at higher risk of long-term side effects from COVID so it was extremely encouraging to see attendees following the rules to ensure everyone could enjoy Flame Con without worrying if they’d catch the virus.

  • There was ample signage posted throughout the event indicating where alternative means of getting around if an attendee couldn’t use the stairs or escalators, including signage to keep enough room open in narrower areas for fellow attendees to move around if they required additional space.

  • Event organizers brought their own signage to turn every hotel bathroom into all-gender bathrooms. Each bathroom had additional signage to indicate if urinals were present and that there were special sanitation receptacles for anyone who required one.

  • Information tables offered pronoun badges for anyone who wished to wear one. They offered traditional “he/him,” “she/her,” “they/them” options, as well as blank ones to create your own or ones that said “ask me” if none of the options matched an attendee’s needs. Walking around the floor, I even saw some attendees get creative and cut out various stickers to create a badge that suited them!

After the event, I teared up realizing this was the first time I truly felt like I was around my people. Growing up near NYC and now living in Washington, D.C., I’ve always felt like an outsider being surrounded by cliquey metropolitan gay men who were quick to judge for the smallest thing. Everyone at Flamecon — the staff, the volunteers, the exhibitors, the attendees, everyone — were SO welcoming, accepting, and downright freaking cool. If you’re not yet sure if Flame Con is must-add to your Con planning, I’d highly recommend you scan social media and search for #FlameCon to see the full community response to the event. So many pictures, memories, and emotions have been shared by those who attended that may help to convince you to make it out for the event’s 10-year anniversary festivities in 2024. I know I’m already counting down the days until I can be there to celebrate!

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